


It will bury us

by SweetSaturn



Category: Control (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Canon was carefully picked for the parts i needed, Gen, I don't know how to English, Implied Casper Darling/Zachariah Trench, Smoking, no beta we die like men, technically canon compliant, wonky timeline
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:47:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27977598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetSaturn/pseuds/SweetSaturn
Summary: If I’ll survive I’m buying you a bowtie. Suits your “mad scientist” style.-How things went wrong, in three parts.
Relationships: Casper Darling & Zachariah Trench
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	It will bury us

**One.**

Everything was great.

They had all the things figured out. Despite more frequent AWEs The Bureau managed to sort them out better each time, Dylan will be the next Director, Zachariah could step out early and won’t be managing all the power he was carefully holding, but deep down loathing; maybe continuing working in the field, as he tried to do with every new opportunity. Like now, as they figured out that it is probably safe to go to this other dimension the Projector opened from Slide-36.

\- Still haven’t changed your mind?

\- Are you kidding? This is one of the greatest discoveries from all the time I’m working here, I won’t pass the opportunity to look behind this veil.

It was early morning, probably too early to already be at work, but neither of them needed to talk about that - these kinds of questions were asked a long time ago when they didn’t know each other. Now early meetings around the coffee machine were almost mundane and as tradition one of them looked with “are you didn’t go home and slept in your office?” in his eyes and other answered with a “like you didn’t do the same” look. 

Darling couldn’t actually argue - it was one of the most interesting expeditions he has been involved in or read about. 

\- I still think you shouldn’t go, at least with the first group, who knows what will happen.

\- Listen, you guys run all the possibilities and deemed it not deadly, there will be a bunch of trained rangers, and I myself am not new to this kind of things, remember?

\- Yeah, sure, but I’m still worried! Don’t want to lose our glorious Director in this... basically ongoing AWE, you know?

The coffee machine decided to have a say in this conversation and wailed as it finished pouring coffee in the pot. This thing was for sure an Altered item but made the best coffee in the whole Bureau and didn’t use much of resources… or any at all, to think about it, so it stayed in one of the rec rooms.

\- I’ll be fine. Managed not to die in actual AWE, and definitely not planning to ruin your research with some inside disaster now.

Trench took his mug of coffee. Smelled more of an Irish coffee than the usual black that this machine was supposed to produce. Judging by Darling side-eyeing the machine it wasn’t just a figment of his imagination. 

Tasted nothing out of ordinary though.

\- If I’ll survive I’m buying you a bowtie. Suits your “mad scientist” style.

That managed to put a little smile on Darling’s nervous face.

\- You think not everyone yet thinks I’m the weird one in here? Pretty sure I’ve heard janitor call me lunatic, and he’s the one who sings tango to plants!

\- I think you should trademark your weirdness. Make it everyone else’s problem. 

\- Well, I’ll think about it. Now I have an expedition to monitor and trying to understand what the hell we’ve stumbled upon.

\- We’ll be fine. You’ll do what you do best, I’ll do what I know and we’ll maybe even get a better grip at understanding this fucked-up reality we live in.

\- Yes, I’m probably just overthinking things, but in our work, it’s better than underthinking, isn’t it? 

\- You tell me, the brain of the operation. Dinner tonight?

**Two.**

There have been casualties.

Of course, there were, with expeditions to Slidescape-36 and all his usual work Casper didn’t keep track of Dylan’s rising agitation and people died. Fucking stupid. Should have known better. Maybe Marshall was right and the boy is not an asset, but a danger. 

All he could do now is take responsibility for his actions, making sure Dylan is kept safe from others (or rather so others will be safe from him), and getting very drunk.

Sitting in his dark office, face buried in hands, trying not to think, not to feel, not to be for a second, he only heard сlink of glass against the wood. Looking up he saw Trench, bit ruffled and looking as tired as Darling felt. And a bottle of whiskey. Good, he hadn’t much alcohol in the office, to begin with, and what he had has ended some time ago.

\- Didn’t want to drink alone but it looks like you didn’t have the same problem.

\- Sorry, I thought you had things to do with all this clusterfuck. Also, there’s no way I could feel more miserable, so what’s the point.

\- What Emily would say if she saw you like this?

\- She saw me starting drinking and she went home and turned off the lights on her way out.

\- How thoughtful.

\- I think I should tell her about everything. About Slide Projector, about Hedron, about Dylan…

\- Do you trust her this much?

\- I know that she can help. She could help find solutions to our problems.

\- Not sure she’ll understand why we did it. And I don’t trust her to get access to this stuff. We don’t know what she would make of it.

Trench found a spare glass and poured whiskey for Darling and himself. Warm. Better than nothing. 

Here, sitting drunk and pathetic, Trench sitting against his desk, everything felt not quite real, just a bit removed from their normal. Casper is lost.

\- Zach. 

\- Mhm?

\- Zach. What should we do next?

Trench’s forehead touched Darling’s temple. Felt like two magnets put together with the wrong sides. Not something that happened before.

\- Sobering up and making a new plan would be a great idea. But maybe in the morning.

\- Pour another one and after that take me out of here.

**Three.**

Getting through the week was the easiest part. Doing what would be better, at least in short term, not making excuses for even little mistakes, working, working, working, listening to Hedron’s whispers about dangers and trying to understand how it even works (probably there’s no point in trying, now things just happened and then he needs to change his life to accommodate them). 

At the end of the week, he’s tired and his colleagues definitely hate him more than before.

He needs to run away and this time there’s no-one who can take him away from him.

Casper goes out of his office and finds the closest cord to Oceanview Motel.

It’s dark and quiet and smells of Zach’s cigarettes. 

Oh fuck.

He goes into the room anyway. They’ve been here together dozens of times. Everyone needs a place where you can just be.

Casper thinks what maybe if he pretends hard enough things will feel the same.

Trench sits on the bed, a half-full ashtray on the bedside table, looking like there’s too much of him for one person and like there’s little left of him at the same time. He says nothing.

Darling takes off his shoes and sits at the foot of the bed. Things that he did times and times again. Feels almost right. 

Zachariah puts his pack of cigarettes between them. Casper doesn’t smoke. Or he does and nothing he remembers is real. He takes one. Tastes familiar. 

Trench lies down across the bed. 

\- I remember missing this, but I don’t feel anything now. 

Casper lies beside him, not touching. Feels like they’re miles apart.

\- I wish I knew how to change that. Existing here with you when things were too much was good.

\- I think all I felt back then is muffled by hatred for you. I don’t know where it came from. I’m sorry.

Somehow the world doesn’t collapse at these words. Casper closes his eyes. Hedron whispers to him about horrible things as he falls asleep.

He’s woken up by a whisper telling him that he is home. He reminds someone of home. Zach’s asleep. It sounds like there’s many of his voice. 

_ Under the conceptual reality behind this reality you must want these waves to drag you away. _

_ After the song, time for applause. _

_ This cliché is death out of time, breaking the first the second the third the fourth wall, the fifth wall, floor; no floor: you fall! _

_ How do you say “insane”? _

_ Hurts to be happy. _

This is hypnotizing, it makes you listen to it, words burning themselves into the brain.

Dr. Darling is fascinated.

Casper is so very afraid.

_ So safe and nothing to worry about. _

Darling thinks about the point after which there was no return. He can’t remember. Past doesn’t matter anymore. He wishes he could make things different, but now he can change only the outcome. He knows what to do.

Dr. Casper Darling takes off his bowtie, puts it beside the ashtray, and goes to the cord to the Bureau.

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know about any mistakes I've made in the text.  
> Also, I've played the game 5 times and still haven't figured out the timeline so I just haven't slept to a point where time doesn't make sense and wrote this.  
> And have a playlist inspired by these two cuz the only thing I do well is reusing the same ten songs for all of my ships https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1CspveQCPlIcZTPU4hSfSW?si=Na4FIZTWT9ux0duHzubolw


End file.
